


forget all about the storm outside

by Archaeodigit_dima



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Gabriel is the dad who pushes everyone to be their best and work as hard as they can, Healthy Fluff, Hurt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 12:07:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13501380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Archaeodigit_dima/pseuds/Archaeodigit_dima
Summary: So I received this prompt about Lorca and Michael (The agonizer being worse than they show on the show and Lorca breaking down) before episode 12 ... So this is pre-revelation of evil Lorca ... Also screw it this canon divergent and Lorca is not an evil asshole!Prime Lorca and Prime Michael. Healthy relationship only here :)





	forget all about the storm outside

Lorca has been in the agonizer for five days on and off. Each time he had been taken out Michael noticed that he was starting to drift more and more. Slurring his words, his shaking hands, leaning against the walls for support. Then there was the accent, a southern accent that she hadn’t even known he hid, but was become more prominent the longer he was subjected to this form of torture. His eyes had become dimmer and filled with pain. It was like watching him die, but in an extremely slow motion. What made it worse was knowing she was the one putting him there. Her heart broke each time she had to be him back into that god forsaken chamber.   
Then Ash turned out to be Voq. Her enemy, someone who had caused her so much pain. She had trusted him, she had loved him. That through cut her deep. It was this man, Klingon, who had helped her connect to her human side that she had always suppressed. Now it was very more present, making her feel like she was drowning in hurt, and yet leaving her empty.   
Michael walked to the brig, were the agonizing chamber that Lorca was being kept. There were guards everywhere in this room, watching her every move. She had to hide all of her pain, push it back so they wouldn’t know she wasn’t this universe’s Michael. But the sight of her captain trembling in pain, screaming, was making that task impossible. Michael knew she had to get him out of here for a bit, get him out that awful machine. She couldn’t lose the last person she could rely upon on this ship. She turned from looking at Lorca to one of the guards.

“Bring my prisoner to my quarters,” Michael announced to the room, fighting to keep her voice even. “I need to question him.”

Michael waited for someone to respond to her order. When no one did she knew that they were questioning her leadership since the assassination attempt by Tyler. His name, just the thought of it cut her deep. She had to show strength now. She could not let anyone think that she was weak, an easy target for an aspiring officer to kill her and take her place as captain of the Shenzou. 

“Are you all deaf?” Michael asked loudly. “Or are you all wanting to spend sometime in the one of these agonizers yourself?”  
“No mam,” came the quick and startled replies of several guards. She stared down each of them in turn with a cool and cutting gaze.  
“Excellent then I expect Lorca to be in my quarters with the next ten minutes. If not each one of you will be enjoying a taste of the agonizer.” 

Each of the guards quickly saluted Michael and went straight to work as she left the room.   
Exactly ten minutes later Lorca was delivered to Michael’s quarters. To her surprise he stood there with a presents she hadn’t seen since their arrival on this ship. He stood upright, glaring at the guards holding his arms. Lorca looked like the no nonsense, screw starfleet command Captain that she knew. 

“Leave the prisoner with me,” Michael stated, putting on her best sneer that she could muster. 

The two guards release Gabriel, who swayed slightly and headed out of the room. He looked over his shoulder as they left. Once he saw the door fully close, knowing they were alone, his tough demeanour evaporated. He collapsed, knees giving way from beneath him. 

“Captain!” Michael called out, concern filling her voice. 

She tried to catch him before he hit the floor, but she wasn’t quick enough. He landed in a crumpled heap on the ground. He was shaking, worse than the last time he had been out of the chamber. Before it had just been his hands, now his entire body was racked with tremors. 

“Captain?” she murmured, standing by him. “Are you alright?”

Michael knew the true answer to the question. He was not alright but she also knew what would come out of his mouth a moment later. It was complete bullshit.

“I’m fine,” Lorca said, his voice hoarse. 

He was shaking and he knew it. The pain he was feeling clouded his vision, it was like a red lense had been put over his eyes, tainting everything he saw. He was slipping. It was getting harder and harder to project the tough exterior to his captors. He wanted to be able to show that tough imagine to Michael as well. Given what she had just lost. Yet as soon as the guards left every ounce of strength he had vanished against his wishes. Now he was lying there in a ball, un able to fight against the tremors that wanted to tear him apart. He didn’t want her to worry about him, to see the fear and concern that filled her face and eyes as she looked down at him, asking him if he was okay. He had to be fine for her, for his crew, to get them back to their universe.

“With all due respect, you do not appear to be fine,” Michael attempted to chastise her captain, tried to have a strong voice. Instead fear and worry seeped into the words. 

As she looked at her captain, lying there in pain not wanting to accept her help she remember Sarek, her father. She remembered the worry and pain she had delt when he was fighting for his life. The anger at him for not letting her in to help, but pushing her away. Then sweeping all that had happened under the rug. Emotions were flooding her senses, she was seeing the same thing happen before with Lorca. He was trying to do everything by himself, even though he was in extreme pain.   
Lorca pushed himself up into a crouch, then slowly began to stand. He wasn’t sure on his feet and started to fall again. This time Michael was close enough to catch him. She grabbed his arm gently and lifted it around to her other shoulder so he could put some of his weight on her. Michael expected him to try and shake her off. Instead he accepted her help. He knew they he needed the help as much as he didn’t want to accept it.   
Lorca leaned in close. With each step he took the tremors became worse, the effort to stay conscious was tremendous. 

“Michael I need to sit down,” he admitted. 

She nodded, leading him just a few more steps to her bed which was closer than table. Lorca leaned onto the edge of the bed. His breathing coming in short bursts, although tremors were only in his hands now. She tried to grab his hand to try and calm the tremors. Lorca pulled away, trying to distance himself from her again.   
Frustrated by his stubborn retreat, Michael got up and headed to her bathroom. She splashed water on her face, the warmth sent a soothing sensation through her. But that was short lived. The tension in her muscles returned, bringing it with it all the emotions, like dam being opened. They rushed through her, drowning her making it hard to breath. She looked at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. She looks tired, even to herself. Tears were well at the corners of her eyes. She wiped at her eyes banishing them. Lorca may be being stubborn and pushing her away. Sarek may have done the same, but she couldn’t let that happen right now. She had to make sure that Lorca was okay, she needed to make sure he was strong. The entire crew needed him so they could get out of this alive.  
She grabbed a cloth, and wet it. She walked back out to find Lorca still sitting on the bed. He had pulled in on him, legs up to his chest, arms wrapped around them. He was leaning against the wall to support himself. He wasn’t looking up at her, he didn’t appear to be looking at anything. Michael walked over to him. Once closer she noticed he was sweating and shaking again. His eyes dull with pain as if he had never been taken out of the agonizer.   
Michael pulled herself up next to Lorca on the bed and gently dabbed at his forehead with the wet cloth. He was warm to the touch, which made her nervous; but at least this time he didn’t shy away from her. 

“It is okay,” Michael said. “You are not alone in this, I am here. We can help each other.” 

Michael spoke quietly trying to comfort him. Lorca knew he what she was saying was true. He had been the one carrying the burdens on his own for so long he didn’t know how to let someone help him anymore. He didn’t want others to carry the consequences of what he has done, he wanted to protect them from everything. Lorca knew that he was getting to the point where he couldn’t do this on his own but he couldn’t - wouldn’t put this on Michael either she had her own struggles. 

“I-I have to do this on my own,” Lorca spoke in a daze. “I-I have to protect my c-crew. I can-n’t let - let -” 

His voice trailed off, breaking into restrained sobs. Michael knew what he was afraid of, he didn’t want a repeat of the Buran. He had never forgiven himself for what happened, despite what everyone at Starfleet believed. Michael didn’t know what to do when she saw Lorca like this. She moved closer to him, hugging him gently, expecting him to pull away. He didn’t, he allowed the contact.

“I have to protect them,” Lorca kept mumbling. “I can’t let them die too.”  
Michael’s breath caught in her throat. She was trying to stay strong but it was difficult. She was scared too, scared that they wouldn’t make it out of this. Lorca’s fear that he was going to let them down and see yet another crew die hurt her. She saw him pulling away to stop it and avoid more hurt. She saw Sarek in this, how he had pulled himself away from her after he knew how much he had hurt her. She had allowed that in a way, even though she told herself that she was holding him accountable but really she just let him walk away. Michael didn’t want that to happen with Lorca, she didn’t know if she would ever get to see her universe’s Sarek again, her father. The entire crew’s ability to see their universe’s loved ones was resting in her’s and the Captain’s hands. They had to be strong. 

“Captain,” Michael’s voice was shaky, as she hugged her captain tighter. “You can do this, we will work together to protect our family.”

Lorca stopped, and looked at her with confusion. 

“A crew becomes a family when they rely on each other as much as the discovery does,” Michael continued.   
“N-no, I just make things worse,” Lorca stammered, his eyes closing. He was getting tired, harder to stay awake.   
“No you do not. You help all of us get to our potential. You helped me find Sarek, giving me all the resources I needed. You know how to push Stamets to push pass his mental blocks and fulfill his potential. Tilley you gave her gentle guidance to find her inner captain. You have become a parent to the entire crew, pushing us to succeed, to be the best we can be.”  
“Hmm,” Lorca mumbled. 

Michael wanted Lorca to know that he wasn’t this awful person he had created in his head. He had help his crew and they were here to help him now. 

“We will get through this,” Michael murmured. “Sometimes the kids have to protect the parents.”

Lorca barely heard the words from Michael, they warmed him. Made him feel wanted and cared for even if he didn’t think he deserved it. He smiled silently as the exhaustion took him, falling into a fitful sleep.

Michael felt the gentle rise and fall of Lorca’s breathing as he drifted to sleep. His muscles relaxed silently, some of the pain leaving him. A little bit of the worry and guilt. Michael sighed with relief. She knew that this was the rest that he needed, time away from the torture she had to inflict on him. She pulled him into a tight hug, his head resting on her shoulder. She didn’t want to leave him alone. She should go back to the bridge to keep up appearances yet she stayed where she was. Not leaving him here to wake up on his own, not taking him back to be tortured again. She wouldn’t do that to him. She let him sleep on her shoulder, even when her arm fell asleep. Lorca was peaceful, at least for this moment he could stay like this before more pain came his way.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it. Got a prompt hit me up on tumblr: archaeologydigit.tumblr.com


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